Finally

Finally met up with u, after 4 months and 22 days. I hav nv changed, but i realised u did. U no longer seem to lead the lifestyle u used to. It was kinda hurting when u said u wanna meet ur frens for ur routine fridae late nite session coz u havent had tt for 2 weeks. I juz met u once and this fridae u want to get back to ur "new routine". There is nothing much i can do if u really miss those 2 weeks abscence with ur frens instead of the 20 over weeks of my abscence. Perhaps our 5 yrs relationship is not as strong as that u have with ur frens of many many many years. Mayb u haf grown up, while i am still stuck in the happy world we used to share. Whu else can i blame but myself. Mayb drinking and wasting ur life late in the nite everyweek is fun, i dunno. Juz like i am sure ur frens will not understand y i rather work on my delts and pecs (maybe more on my bis and tris), and y i consider fun as my weekly refugees soccer, seeing the fucking high ball and hear pple shout its mine and my balls shrink when i go for it, and y i consider fun as doing push ups after i kena a fucking unrespectable 50-10. Mayb u and i haf different directions since i left. What am i supposed to do? What can i do? I dunno, and i dun realli wanna care. I hav been hurt enough, as Chan said, mayb its time to love myself. And i will. I will get out of this shit pit i am coz i love myself, I will not let anyone do a 50-10 to me coz i love myself, and i will no longer let my balls shrink when the ball is juz a little high, fuck ya high balls coz i love myself.